18/Jan/2012

Current Thoughts: Karen needs to pick a profession other than acting...

50 Reasons Why 'Abduction' Sucked

1. “Dude, you’re crazy.” Yes I am because this is seriously the only entertaining thing here in Pennsylvania.

2. Wow, eyebrows.

3. Make it super immature/awkward while walking by each other.

4. Getting drunk at the same party? This party is still going? I’d so be going somewhere else. You never stay at a party the WHOLE time.

5. His mother is blonde & white. Dad is super white too. This never went through his head before that he’s super Indian looking & they aren’t?

6. “Good game.” Don’t be a punkass, high five him.

7. You can tell he was totally wearing a chest guard.

8. He doesn’t even have a bead of sweat.

9. I don’t get why in movies they always show the drying of dishes. Because it’s not the end of the task when they are going to shove it into the dishwasher anyway.

10. Ooh, the mailbox hit. That sure showed you.

11. He’s always creepin’.

12. “I still have the dreams.” So then you don’t have insomnia.

13. Not typical high school wrestling attire.

14. Random shitty music spurts.

15. He has an Aprella but he can’t afford a bigger TV.

16. “You still like games.” Uh yeah, you know what the age group for MW3 is?

17. “Close it please.” Weird zoom out.

18. He’s “scrolling” on his laptop & the screen’s not even moving.

19. Not going to walk her downstairs? No etiquette whatsoever & he supposedly likes her.

20. Why would they still have his kid clothes?

21. “Be back for dinner.” What the fuck time is it???

22. Who still names their kid Karen? That’s such a 50’s name.

23. This project just got REALZ.

24. Why would he need his birth certificate for a fake ID?

25. That birth certificate isn’t even correct for Pennsylvania.

26. I have a ton of photos with people cropped out of them.

27. WTF is dad doing with a carpeting hammer on his lawnmower?

28. A double sided kick would really work well but the side effects of landing on your side would really suck. There are better ways of kicking someone’s ass.

29. Why hasn’t anyone called the cops yet?

30. You have to be 21 to not wear a helmet in Pennsylvania.

31. Ha, the horrible green screen of them on his bike.

32. Vladimir Putin’s shitty tattoo, they must’ve run out of money for a good makeup artist, to make it look somewhat real.

33. Why was he connected to the CIA without him explaining who he is or why he’s calling?

34. How can he possibly remember that address under those circumstances going on?

35. If it is moonlight, why are their faces so lit up in a warm way?

36. I like how “eyebrows” still has all her makeup perfect.

37. What the hell is he doing with that steering wheel???? That’s a damn sloppy ///M Series.

38. Their shadows change sizes when they’re getting their IDs.

39. “So hungry; he might like that.” I talk out loud to myself a lot too.

40. CGI breaking of glass.

41. Taking long enough for everyone to respond to two snipers going down.

42. Their cups keep changing in the diner.

43. Horrible cinematography of them in the truck.

44. His chair would have flipped up to show the gun.

45. Either they’re talking that low to each other or everyone around them can totally hear that conversation.

46. He cocked the hammer, but it wasn’t cocked when it was on the ground.

47. I love how they just scooped up the body & everybody’s like happy day.

48. Dad’s mouth/face is super white & the visions of his mother are white too so was he adopted by them too? This still doesn’t explain why he’s so dark.

49. “I’ll have him home.” You don’t even know her address, unless she lives at that shrink office.

50. Yesterday she’s in the hospital with bruises & shit on her arm, but apparently she’s got super healing powers because it’s all gone.

FAIL.